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The Rapids Starting XI...as Star Trek Characters

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Yeah, I admit this is kind of crazy and exceedingly nerdy. But, what the heck, right?

Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

EDITOR'S NOTE:  Thank you to The Rapids Rabbi and Total Soccer Show for giving me the courage to do this

I am an unabashed lover of Star Trek.  I don't hide it, I embrace it.  Certainly there have been good Star Trek series and movies and bad ones.  That happens in every great series of our time (Star Wars has had some stinkers for example).  But by and large I enjoy the bulk of what has come out in the Star Trek universe.

Over the past week of getting better (if you don't follow me on Twitter I have been wicked sick with temps near 104) I watched a lot of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and I began to wonder if the Rapids were Star Trek characters, who would they be.  (I know, that is some serious nerd stuff).  So I began to think about this and decided that there were too many characters in the Star Trek world to choose from so I limited it to Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.

First, here is my predicted Colorado Rapids starting XI (when everyone is healthy).  Now, this is my preferred Starting XI and may not be what Pablo Mastroeni rolls out this year, but as we are having fun with this....let's go with it.

My Rapids Predicted Starting XI

So nothing earth shattering here and this is probably pretty close to how things are going to be when everyone is healthy and ready to go.  Sean St. Ledger and Marco Pappa are battling injury and may not be ready on March 6, but I imagine Dr Crusher and Dr Bashir (see what I did there) will be doing their best to get them going ASAP.

And despite all of the speculation with Tim Howard joining the Rapids, he is not here yet and until he is wearing Burgundy, MacMath is my starter.

But taking into account that Starting XI and my love for Star Trek, I came up with a Starting XI based on ST:TNG and ST:DS9.  Feel free to ridicule and laugh at me:

GK:  Zac MacMath, imagined as Constable Odo (ST: DS9)

Look, you want a goalkeeper that is fearless and is willing to do what is necessary in goal.  If you remember, Odo did the hard thing by siding against his people in the Dominion War.  And for goodness sakes, he is changeling!  He can stop anything.  And he is not afraid to get in other people's business as he did with Worf, Quark and Captain Sisko on a number of occasions.  He wears #1 for me and for this imaginary Star Trek Starting XI.

LB:  Mekeil Williams, imagined as Quark (ST: DS9)

In a left back you want someone who can dart up the wings but also get back and play some defense.  Quark is short and fast and will run you down, but also take people out as need be.  And he is playing for the money (he is Ferengi after all) and therefore will give his all for a contract.

CB:  Sean St. Ledger, imagined as Lt Commander Worf (ST: TNG and ST: DS9)

Worf would scare the shit out of anyone that attempts to take him out and when you hear him yell "PERHAPS TODAY IS A GOOD DAY TO DIE!!!  PREPARE FOR RAMMING SPEED" you best take him at your word.  He will destroy you.

CB:  Axel Sjoberg, imagined as Commander Riker (ST: TNG)

I have Riker here mainly because of the partnership that he has with Worf.  The two of them have shed blood together and have kicked ass together.  That partnership can't be understated.  Much like the partnership of Sjoberg and St. Ledger, the partnership of Worf and Riker will be successful.

RB:  Eric Miller, imagined as Chief O'Brien (ST: TNG and ST: DS9)

The Chief.  The thinker.  The tinkerer.  The guy that gets stuff done.  That is what you want in a right back and the Chief brings that.  He also has a good relationship with the rest of the back four and has sneaky skills to get involved in the attack.  And as a veteran of fighting with Cardassia and the Dominion, you know he is ready to take on all comers.

DM:  Sam Cronin, imagined as Elim Garak (ST: DS9)

You need that midfield destroyer.  Cronin is that destroyer.  And so is Garak.  He is a guy that will kill and destroy the opposition.  I mean that literally.  Garak was one of the most complex Star Trek characters ever and he is my midfield destroyer.

DM:  Dillon Powers, imagined as General Martok (ST: DS9)

For my other D-Mid, I wanted an imposing presence and Martok is that guy.  He is someone who will get into attack (he led the Klingon forces against Cardassia and the Dominion) but is a physical player that will strike fear in his opponents.

LM:  Shkelzen Gashi, imagined as Captain Benjamin Sisko (ST: DS9)

I need my wing players to have that leadership quality that raises the game of those around them, but also the speed and knowledge to get involved in the attack.  Quite simply: they have to be able to score goals and lead the team.  This is what Captain Sisko can do.  He will be able to bring the ball forward and get his teammates involved, but also score when needed.  A born leader, and my vice captain.

CM:  Marco Pappa, imagined as Lt Commander Data (ST: TNG)

Data, as an android, is fast and intelligent and is everything I want in a #10.  He will lead the attack and get others involved.  He will feed the ball to our striker and run down anyone on the field.  He will get all eleven players going and will be the offensive threat we need.

RM:  Dillon Serna, imagined as Captain Jean-Luc Picard (ST: TNG)

Jean-Luc Picard is my captain and my right mid.  He will be able to cross the ball in from the wing and be a set piece specialist.  He is tough (he was assimilated by the Borg once) and is not afraid to sacrifice himself for the betterment of his team.  We are in good hands with Picard along the right wing and as our Captain.

F:  Kevin Doyle, imagined as Lt Commander Jadzia Dax (ST: DS9)

As a trill, Dax offers lifetimes of experiences (seven to be more precise) and with that experience she is able to be the target forward we need.  She will hold the ball up and feed it to her wing players but will be a danger in the air and score many goals off corners.  She is a prototypical #9.

So there you have it.  I have presented my Rapids Starting XI imagined as Star Trek characters.  I welcome your comments or suggestions about this and who would be in your lineup.  Let me know your thoughts!